"He that can have patience can have what he will."

Benjamin Franklin

Negotiation is an art that, like many things in life, requires patience. Patience is not just a personality trait but a skill that can be honed and sharpened like any other tool in a negotiator’s toolkit. Let’s dive into a simple yet powerful tactic to master the waiting game in negotiations.

The Cooking Analogy: Patience in the Kitchen

I’m a terrible cook. I really have no business being anywhere near the kitchen unless I'm there to wash dishes. But through my many, often hilarious, escapades in the kitchen, I've learned one important lesson: cooking requires patience. No matter how hard I try (and I've tried), I can't make water boil or bread toast any faster than the natural laws of physics will allow.

Negotiation is No Different: It Requires Patience

In negotiations, organizations will often pressure negotiators to speed up the process because they feel it's taking too long to get a contract done. On the other side, suppliers will use end-of-month, quarter, or year deadlines to force customers to concede on other, sometimes more valuable, points in the negotiation.

Good negotiators recognize that this pressure is inevitable and plan for it accordingly. They understand that patience, viewed as a skill, can be developed and refined.

A Simple Tactic: Ask What Will Happen if the Deadline Isn’t Met

One simple way to practice patience when faced with impending deadlines in a negotiation is to ask, "What will happen if the deadline isn't met?" It’s surprising how often organizations rush to get a contract signed by a specific date but have a hard time justifying the urgency.

Why Asking the Right Questions Matters

Asking what happens the day after the deadline if the contract isn't signed is a tough question. Negotiators, especially those in procurement, are often told, “Yours is not to question why, yours is but to do or die.” So asking why something has to be done by a certain date can seem rebellious.

However, with the right context, this question can demonstrate the strategic thought process of an elite negotiator. Here’s how you can frame it:

1. Identify Critical Points: Before asking about the deadline, lay out some of the most critical points in the negotiation which you expect the other side to push back on.
2. Weigh the Importance: Ask what happens if the deadline is missed so that you can weigh the importance of the deadline against the other points to be negotiated.

Armed with this information during negotiations, your team will see you as a master strategist while the other side thinks you have the patience of a saint. All it takes is the guts to ask one simple question.

Conclusion

Patience in negotiation, like in cooking, is a critical ingredient for success. By questioning the urgency of deadlines and understanding the true implications of missing them, negotiators can maintain control and achieve better outcomes. The next time you’re pressured by an impending deadline, remember to ask, “What will happen if the deadline isn't met?” This simple tactic could transform your negotiation strategy and demonstrate your prowess as an elite negotiator.